Fine Dining
by clockwork'sFinest
Summary: Maybe he wouldn't feel so bad about holding his girlfriend's hand, if only her older sister wasn't playing a one-sided game of footsie with him under the table. Humanstuck. Solara.


"You sure they'll like me?"

He choked, Aradia had just pushed the doorbell to her own house. She brought him here for dinner, in order to introduce her family to her new boyfriend.

She looked back at him smiling, "Yeah! You're the best."

Sollux looked down, "What if they think I'm not good enough for their preciouth Aradia?"

"Pretty sure you've got it backwards," She gave hand one last reassuring squeeze before the door was unlocked, not opened, just not locked.

He could've sworn he heard his girlfriend curse as she opened the door for themselves, "Thanks, Damara."

Sollux was hauled inside by his pissed lover, and fuck if what Mituna said wasn't true.

"_Don't talk to her older thithter, sheth really really pretty, but altho really really mean!"_

This was kind of like every cliche, the older sister being much more attractive than her little sister. But he liked Aradia, and Aradia only.

The inside of her house is exactly how he imagined it, painted with warm earth toned colors and covered with ancient artifacts. It actually looked pretty asian; the low, almost floor-level coffee table and mats instead of couches. Homey, Sollux decided.

He heard some loud talking in japanese, he guessed. And then heard Aradia reply in an equal volume. It was giving him a headache.

"Hello, welcome to my home." A firm, yet feminine voice greeted. Before Sollux could reply, the same voice shouted something, the only thing he heard was the mention of Damara's name.

The girl in question rolled her eyes, "Hi," He guessed her mom scolded her for not introducing herself? Aradia had a japanese accent sure, but it wasn't as bad as her sisters. Her mom even had a good way of covering it.

"Um," He cleared his throat, "Hello. I'm Thollux..Captor."

She was a nice lady, short like her daughters and thick like Aradia, but very kind. Her mom bowed and Aradia urged him to do the same. Bowing felt weird, but the house had a low ceiling so he guessed he couldn't complain.

Damara muttered something in her adorable native language and then led them to the dining room, which had modern chairs and a dinner table. Set for four.

Ms. Megido went back in the kitchen to check on dinner, and it was just him, his girlfriend, and her hot older sister. Sollux and Aradia seated at one side, while Damara sat directly in front of him. She was taller, still short, but taller than Aradia. Had a slim body but still retained the assets her little sister had. He didn't mind a little chub, which was exactly what Aradia had, in fact, he loved it. Her petite, round body complimented his tall skinny frame quite nicely.

Damara had her legs perched up on the table, pushing buttons loudly on her cellphone. Everything about her screamed Tokyo, while the rest of her family seemed more cultured japanese. As if her brightly colored tank top, short skirt, and heeled sandals didn't say enough, she was texting away on a hot pink sequined keyboard cellular, with what looked like a pikachu phone charm hooked at the top. So kawaii.

Aradia looked almost plain in comparison. He wondered if she knew, if she resented her sister for being such a firecracker and leaving her dull. But alas, there was a reason he was with her, because he saw through her insecurities and she was more than good enough for him. Aradia was humble, honest, and ridiculously beautiful.

Sollux put an arm around his girlfriend's shoulder, because she was _perfect._

Aradia gave him a warm smile, her sister seemed to take notice and put her phone down, drumming her red nails on the countertop. "So," more broken english, "how long you together?"

She only made eye contacted with Sollux.

He coughed, "Well I've known Aradia for a few years now, and we had a few classes last semester, but I've only asked her last week." Aradia put a hand on his thigh, patting it.

Damara raised an over-tweezed eyebrow, "Nee-san, why you no invite him before if know each other for that long?"

Sollux turned to her too, he'd invited her several times to his house before when they were still in highschool, so why hadn't she?

Aradia must've felt like she was being interrogated. She only shrugged.

Their mom came out of the kitchen, carrying something with both hands. Setting the hot covered pot, she scolded her sister again. Probably to set the table. She groaned and trudged out of the room.

He was right; Damara came out with chopsticks, bowls, and cups. Ms. Megido went back in the kitchen for a minute, and then brought a smaller pot of steamed rice, and a jar of tea.

Aradia unlidded the pot and steam immediately poured out. When it was only a bit murky, Sollux peeked into it, he had the strong urge to ask what the fuck it was. But later decided against it, that was probably rude.

After serving everyone, her mom took the seat next to Damara, in front of Aradia. She clapped her hands together, smiling with the same dimples her daughter had, "Itadakimasu."

His girlfriend nodded, repeating the phrase, and her sister dryly muttered something akin to it. While he stayed silent, afraid he might mispronounce it. The girls began eating right after they'd said it, leaving him to stare at his food intently.

Sollux suddenly felt three pairs of narrow eyes on him, he looked up smiling sheepishly, "Tadakathu." He grabbed the small teaspoon and put it directly into his bowl of soup and lifted it to his mouth.

Shit was hotter than the surface of the sun. Grabbing his mug he downed it in one go, too bad he hadn't realized it was hot green tea.

It.

Fucking.

Burned.

He heard Damara laugh obnoxiously at his expression, while Aradia looked sympathetic and her mom a little insulted. Oh fuck, he'd already ruined this. Now she was going to kick him out of her house and forbid him from ever seeing her daughter.

"Sollux," Aradia giggled, "like this, see?" She grabbed her chopsticks and picked at a lump of rice, skillfully dipping it in her soup and, after blowing on it gently, into his mouth. He smiled awkwardly while chewing, it was really good with rice, too bad he couldn't really taste it due to the second degree burns on his tongue.

He frowned when he noticed he'd used the spoon for tea, everyone's tea. When Damara handed him a pair of chopsticks was when he really paled. He swore she did it just to watch him whither.

Sollux took the sticks carefully and when he tried separating them, they broke. She laughed at him, while Aradia got up after pinching his cheek, "It's okay."

She came out with a new teaspoon, a fork and a plate. He watched pathetically while she emptied his rice bowl on the plate, splashing a bit of soup over it and gave him the fork.

He felt so fucking stupid, eating with a fork while they expertly ate with chopsticks. He supposed it was all in the wrist, years of masturbating didn't do him any good.

"Sollux," Her mom brought him out of his mortification, he looked up at her respectfully.

"Yeth?" He winced inwardly at his lisp. Fucking braces.

"What do you do for a living?" Her voice was so nice, it was soft but at the same time firm, ideal for a mother.

Sollux took another gulp of his tea and _again_ forgot how hot it was. While he was choking Aradia answered, "Sollux works for geek squad. He's really good with computers."

Oh motherfuck, did she have to? She couldn't have just left it vague with a _he works with computers_? He watched her mother raise an eyebrow, unamused while her sister cackled. If Mituna was right about one thing, it was that Damara _was_ really really mean.

She kept saying something in between giggles, and it must've been offensive because Aradia flipped her shit, "Nee-san! Okaa-san, tell her!"

"Damara, settle down and do not be rude to our guest." Ms. Megido berated.

When her cruel laughter ceased, she questioned again, "Your brother Mituna?"

Sollux nodded, not trusting his mouth to say something stupid. "Ah, I remember because eyes."

She was talking about his heterochromia, one eye a rich brown, while the other a deep blue. HIs brother had it switched, rather than the right eye being brown like Sollux's, Mituna had it blue. Same shade, just different places.

"Why wires?" Damara asked again, pointing to her own teeth.

Um, maybe because gaped teeth were unattractive as hell? He's had braces since middle school, pesky teeth they were.

Aradia had enough, "Because they make him look cuter." She shook his hair and kissed his cheek.

"Oi!" Her mother snapped. Public displays of affection were probably frowned upon in this house.

"Thorry." He quickly spoke, putting her hand back on her lap, but still holding it. Aradia intertwined their fingers under the table, rubbing softly with her thumb.

Dinner went by mostly quietly after that, and he really felt like he messed up. But it wasn't like he kissed her, so he wasn't to blame entirely. Still, it would help if her mom wasn't staring him down like that.

Ms. Megido spoke again in japanese, and Damara helped her clean the table. Once they left them alone, Sollux spoke, "Dammit AA, did you have to?"

She giggled, "Who cares? She probably already knows we're sleeping together."

He made a noise, he didn't tell Mituna or his dad, or even Karkat that they'd banged.

"Okay well it'th thtill pretty weird, having dinner with your daughter and her boyfriend who've had thex."

Aradia shrugged, "It's okay, she likes you."

Sollux could only sputter out a "Doubt it," before they came back out of the kitchen, her sister clutching a tray of white dumplings kabobed and glazed with dark paste. Not that he could see, he made it a point to avert eye contact with them now, only looking down.

Her mom was holding a green pot of tea, when they sat she poured each person a small amount of brown tea. All the girls took a sip so he did too, slowly though. It was bitter, a sharp sting.

Aradia handed each person two sticks of dumplings, "Mitarashi dango," her mom smiled.

He smiled back, relieved she didn't hate him anymore.

And all was good, the white dumplings were soft as clouds and sweet as sugar, he finally understood why they chose to serve bitter tea.

That is, until he felt something rub against his ankle. He almost jumped, but he steeled himself, not wanting to bring attention again. He looked around to see if they'd felt it too, but Aradia and her mom only munched merrily at their treat, while Damara was smirking in between bites.

His girlfriend turned to him, "Want another one?" He could only shake his head, scared of his voice cracking, because fuck her sisters feet were now caressing his ankles. Aradia smiled, rubbing soft circles on his knuckles again.

Maybe he wouldn't feel so bad about holding his girlfriend's hand, if her older sister wasn't playing a one-sided game of footsie with him under the table.

Sollux considered pushing her feet away, or stepping on them, but he couldn't, that would be really rude. So instead he pulled his feet back under his chair. Big mistake, because then, he felt the same pair of feet on his knees, moving slowly up to his thighs.

Who would've known he'd be in this situation and end up hating it. Damara was fucking hot, what did she want with a younger dork like him? She couldn't possibly be interested in a scrawny, blonde loser like himself.

He started trembling, and he really really hoped he wouldn't get a boner. What he wanted most was for her to stop. It was antagonizing, watching her watch him squirm in his seat.

Aradia seemed to notice his trembling and while in the middle of asking if he was okay, saw her sister's red sandals on her boyfriends lap. Too close for either of their comforts.

"Damara!" She stood, her chair was knocked down.

"Nani Nee-chan?" Her sister tilted her head, condescending almost.

Oh godfuckingdamnit, now AA would think he was a cheater, and her mom would castrate him for trying to get with both her daughters.

Every woman there collapsed into shrieks, Damara getting up and in her sisters face while their mother held the clean dango sticks shouting something in japanese.

Both girls quieted at her voice, muttering "Hai Okaa-san."

Sollux sat there, utterly horrified. He briefly wondered who was going to beat him first, or if they were all going to gang up on him at the same time.

He heard her mom order something from Damara, who rolled her eyes and threw a half-assed apology to both of them, "Gomenasai Imoto, gomen Sollux-kun."

"Uh," he stammered, "thank..you?"

She gave him a look, "Said sorry baka, not praise." Ms. Megido scolded her on her way upstairs, but Damara ignored her.

Her mom exhaled loudly, and he somehow knew she wanted help cleaning up. Sollux collected all four dishes with his lanky arms. After cradling them in his left arm, he fixed the chairs with his free hand. Aradia smiled brightly at the gesture, picking up the large plate of dango and walking after him into the kitchen.

She went in after them, and smiled when she saw her daughter doing the dishes and the boy drying them before setting them on the cupboard.

"Okaasan, what do you want me to do with the rest of them?" Aradia asked, referring to the uneaten dango.

Ms. Megido eyed Sollux for a second before advising, "Give them to Sollux, a growing boy needs them."

But Sollux already stood at 6'2, he didn't need any more growing. "Oh, no, you shouldn't-"

"Nonsense, you're all skin and bones. Take them to your family, your father used to love them."

Sollux nodded, genuinely happy. "Thank you, Mith Megido."

She smiled, "You have my blessing child, oh and tell the Helmsman they're from the Handmaid."

"I will, thank you again, for everything." Aradia's mom approached him for a hug. "My pleasure boy." She hugged his waist because he was that tall.

After that, Aradia walked her boyfriend out to his car.

"Sorry about that," she leaned on his chest, "It's why I didn't bring you here before. But my mom was dying to meet you-"

"AA, it'th cool, I should be the one apologizing." He put both around around her shoulders.

"Yeah but, Damara and-"

"I already told you, it'th okay."

She looked up at him, "Well, okay."

He leaned down and kissed her, she put the plate of dango on top of his trunk and wrapped her arms around his neck, letting him in her mouth. His hands wandered towards her hips, jerking them to his.

"Aradia!" And then something else in japanese, her mom's shouts startled them. He quickly let go of her as gently as he could. "Thorry mith Megido! Bye AA, thee you tomorrow."

She smiled, giggling. Sollux got into his car and after putting his seatbelt on, heard a knock outside the glass.

He rolled his window down, taking the plate of forgotten sweets from his girlfriend and giving her one last quick kiss before her mother scolded them again, "Bye Aradia, I love you."

Aradia waved and blew a kiss after him. Then walked back inside her house.

Later that night, when Sollux was explaining everything in detail to his older brother who was eating the leftovers with him, his dad came home. Dango must've left an impressionable scent in his memory because he quipped, "Hey is that dango?"

"Yeah," he extended the plate to share with his father, "their from the handmaid."

His dad's jaw loosened a little in disbelief, before putting a whole dumpling in his mouth. He made weird noises to express his content with the treat.

He turned his back on his sons, chuckling lowly, "She was always good with her hands."

They watched him go to his room, equal parts disgusted and confused.

"Grody Dad!" Mituna shrieked as he shut the door to his bedroom.

* * *

**yoooo**

**lol anime fanfiction pays off when you gotta write bout em asian megidos brah**

**headcannon that aradia is japanese and sollux is a white boy that got luckaaaaaaaay**

**but forreal, damara is totally the type to steal her little sisters boyfriends, **

**cause she a bad bitch like that**


End file.
